Why I Fired My Secretary
This is a true story. Last week was my 40th birthday and I really didn't
feel like waking up that morning. I managed to pull myself together and go
downstairs for breakfast, hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy
Birthday!", and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she
barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday." I thought. Well, that's
marriage for you, but the kids. They will remember.
My kids came trampling down the stairs to breakfast, ate their breakfast,
and didn't say a word to me. So when I made it out of the house and started
for work, I felt pretty dumpy and despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary Joanne said, "Good Morning Boss,
and by the way Happy Birthday!" It felt a bit better knowing that at least
someone remembered. I worked in a zombie like fashion until about one o'clock,
when Joanne knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful
day outside, and it's your Birthday, why don't we go out for lunch, just you
and me." I said, "Thanks, Joanne, that's the best thing I've heard all day.
Let's go!"
We went to lunch but not where we'd normally go. Instead she took me to a
quiet bistro with a private table. We had a couple of mixed drinks and I
enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Joanne said,
"You know, It's such a beautiful day. We don't have to go right back to the
office, do we?" I replied with "I suppose not. What do you have in mind?"
She said, "Let's go to my apartment, it's just around the corner."
After arriving at her apartment, Joanne turned to me and said, "Boss if you
don't mind, I'm gonna to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be
right back." "Ok." I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after
a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake.
Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends, and co-workers, all
singing "Happy Birthday".
And I just sat there.
On the couch.
Naked.
